… is it sad that it was work?
I’ve been asking myself this very question for quite a while because there is fine balance between “Yes” and “No”. So I’m going to talk about these:
“Yes”
It can be considered sad because there is a large part of me that wants to spend time at work more than going out and socialising. I am boardering on being a work-a-holic and I work for a company that heavily promotes work-life balance.
Yesterday, being Waitangi Day I went in to work. I don’t have after hours access and so resigned myself to the fact that I wasn’t destined to get the work done that I wanted. I consoled myself with a movie. Amanda Crew… gigdy.
The other argument towards this is that I have no sense of self management and I am disorganised so I have to go in and make up the time… this is partly actually true.
“No”
It’s really cool that I can sit here and tell you I love my job. I love what I do and not only because I love the city I live in, that it isn’t what I was doing before hand but without a doubt certainty I love my job. Yeah, managing people can piss people off but when you actually do something or you come up with a better way of doing something or someone just gets it… god it’s satisfying. Knowing that you’ve gone above and beyond but for the right reasons, not to brown nose or get brownie points but because you genuinely want to is… it’s just fucking awesome.
So why would I leave? Why would I give it up to try something else?
I don’t have the largest amount of self confidence. There were several times when I would put on the face that was required and I will admit that over time, my self confidence is probably less so than normal. I struggle to meet new people because I’m just not into what most people are and I find internet dating not an avenue I am too keen on venturing towards.
My job is one of the few things where I can sit in front of you and tell you “I’m actually quite good at it” and mean it. I have people, including high end managers, who believe in me and my abilities which is a blessing – props – and a curse – holy crap, the pressure – at the same time.
If you’re not on facebook then I say facebook fail to you but I’ll talk about that soon. On facebook, you have a status and a while back my facebook status was “… is waiting”. A person asked the question as to what I was waiting for and I was not in a position to say… now I am.
When I joined the organisation I realised there was a huge window of opportunity to be had and so have made sacrifices as most people to get what I want (moved to Auckland for example). I have been quite selfish in doing this but I can look back on it and say that it was worth it. I used my time to make an impression and that impression has stuck.
2 days ago, I was recommended to the senior management to take on a project because I was said to have “great analytical and people skills”. The project, which I can’t disclose any detail about, is EXACTLY what I’ve been looking for since I joined the organisation. A real chance to make my mark (sometimes I hate my name) and make a difference. This is make or break time baby… and fuck I can’t wait.
The other reason I am having a great day is because I’m listening to some fantastic music and have also been advised of some great music. Thievery Corporation, Dave Matthews Band, Death Cab For Cutie (now I can see why people rave about them), Snow Patrol, Fall Out Boy, and Bedouin Soundclash (who I’m going to see live soon) to name a few. So very vey very good.
… and to end, the facebook thing. I hate applications that make me invite poeple. I hate people sending my applications. I hate disclosing private details on the interwebs, I don’t see why people who don’t know me should know that shit about me and why people who do know me need to go to the interweb to find it out >.<
That said, facebook is great me remembering email addresses because I don’t. I send you a message on facebook, you get a notification saying “… has sent you a message” in your email, you log on to facebook, there is your message. It reminds me when your birthday is so that I can actually say “Happy Birthday” on the day rather than sucking it down and forgetting (Moob, I suck. I realised this about 3 days ago, 1 month too late). It helps me organise a posse to go to the Beer Festival when it’s in Wellington.
I love facebook because most of my friends are on it and I get to keep in touch with them even if in a lazy way.
I can contact them whenever I want, live vicariously through their photos and have other countries promoted to me which makes me want to visit them not only because they look great but because people I like are in them.
Pfft to facebook, you say? Have you actually sat down and tried it?
Awesome, man. Well done!! and good luck :)